Locked up in luxury is still locked up

So the first week of quarantine has just passed and we've just been told that the original 15-day period is going to be extended by a further 15 days. Great. The first couple of days were the worst for me as it was a huge shock to my system.

I'm a creature of habit, in love with my routines and these were all taken away from me. "No problem" I thought. I consider myself pretty switched on upstairs (at times) and sincerely believed that I would find a logical solution to this situation and sail on through like I do with most things. Easily done... in theory. About the third day onwards the hours, days and dates started melding into each other and up until a few hours ago I hadn't realised that today was Sunday.

My already terrible sleeping pattern was thrown into further disarray so I found myself going to sleep around 5am which would normally mean me staggering into bed, exhausted except I wasn’t. As I wasn’t using up much energy during the day due to being stuck indoors, I went to sleep at 5am as calmly as if it was my usual bedtime of around midnight. Waking up times were also seemingly randomly generated and so far this week it has been between 8am and 11am.

The worst part I’ve been trying to deal with (unsuccessfully) is the sudden wave of apathy that has swept over me. I’ve put off answering text messages and not answered calls from most people which is very unlike me. I don’t know why but it feels as though I’ve given up deep down inside. Is it my way of expressing being fed up of the situation? Perhaps it’s a way for my subconscious to suppress the anger I have inside about this whole thing? I don’t know.

I try to convince myself that this is far from a ‘terrible’ quarantine all things considered but even though I am holed up in relative luxury I recall the saying that “everyone has their own demons and everyone deals with them in their own way” and can’t help but smile at how this rings true right now. I just hope that when this whole thing is eventually over I will remember how to carry on with my life as I did pre-quarantine.

We are born, we do stuff, we die

I've just got word that Kobe Bryant has died. He wasn't my favourite player by a long shot (that spot belongs to Penny!) but no one can deny that he was synonymous with pretty much anything to do with the NBA during his professional ball career which spanned two decades.

I'm not really the spiritual type but when I heard about his death an hour or so ago, the realisation that we, as a species, can actually die at any time. Perhaps this was a Captain Obvious moment but while we can try our hardest to prolong the visit from the Grim Reaper, we all know that despite our different beliefs that his (does the Grim Reaper even have a gender?) inevitable knock on the door will come - whether we expect it or not.

I know people that live their life to the fullest (their version of it at least) and seem to almost not expect making it to another sunrise. I also know people who plan so far ahead (I'm guilty of this too) that it almost doesn't make sense as the probability that all the variables between the moments in time are properly considered is very slim.

Between birth and death there's this bit in between that differs from person to person. Some people call it life.

"'Tis impossible to be sure of anything but Death and Taxes"

- Christopher Bullock (1716)

My first audiobook

I'm a bit of a serial multitasker. I enjoy finding efficiencies by 'creating' time out of nothing. I think that the only real way of gaining time is by finding synergies in activities so that more can be done within the same period of time.

I work with computers quite a bit and it's not uncommon to find me sat at my desk and surrounded by several screens and devices looking a bit like a those security guards in charge of the surveillance cameras. For instance, earlier this morning I had open:

• Screen 1: An Excel spreadsheet where I was modelling the finance and construction of a small residential development.

• Screen 2: Football Manager 2020 video game. I don't need to interact much while its matches play out so I just need to keep an eye on the match.

• iPad: Roger Federer vs. Marton Fucsovics at the Australian Open (on mute).

• Sound: I had my audiobook playing on the Amazon Audible app.

Normally I would have my music on or perhaps have the sound on the iPad up so I could listen to the commentary and/or the match sounds. This time around I had the audiobook on and I was genuinely surprised at how easy it was to keep track of the book's narrator while everything else was going on. My book was a self-development type book so considering I remember some of the lessons mentioned, I'd say that I did successfully take in the information.

I enjoy reading and I usually read in bed either first thing in the morning if I have time or before I go to bed. With the audiobooks I can now integrate this activity while doing several others!

I've also tried substituting my usual music with the audiobook when running errands around town and I've definitely felt a good level of satisfaction knowing that I was being productive while being productive.

Where have these things been all my life? Now I have yet another reason to keep giving Amazon my money.

Anonymous Therapy

This blog is for me to put down some of my thoughts on paper albeit digitally. Let's call it anonymous therapy. It's easier to let it out that way I think.